There is a story in the news of a woman found dead in her garage and possibly she has been there for 6 years. She was found in her car mummified. The story has not been told yet if she died of natural causes or committed suicide. When I heard this story I thought to my self how the hell can someone be dead for so long and no one notice or care. It made me wonder what kind of world do we live in that this could happen to another human being. I grew up in a farming area and we knew all our neighbors even the grouchy old people who did not want to know anyone. If a neighbor did not show their face for a few days someone checked on them. The woman was in her 40's and lived alone and had all her bills paid electronically and often worked away from home for long periods of time so no one thought anything of her not being seen.
Maybe its my upbringing but I have always made an effort to know who lives in and around me. I remember when I moved into an apartment building when I lived in Pittsburgh. I was moving my things in on the first day and said hello to a lady in the entryway getting her mail she looked at me like I had just called her a name or was going to rob her. She said hello in a guarded manner and then rushed up the stairs and hurried into her apartment. As I was moving in I could see people peeking out the windows and a few opened their doors a crack only to slam them shut if they noticed me looking in their direction. This behavior was strange to me after living for years in an Army barracks which is much like a college dorm everyone knows each other and walks freely from room to room. Also like I said when I was young we knew our neighbors and their families like an extension of our own family.
I being somewhat of a country boy small town kid or what ever you want to call it was just not used to the city ways and being so guarded and afraid of people. It took me a while and a lot of hellos and coaxing but I got to know the people in my apartment complex and even became friends with a few. I helped them carry groceries held the door open as they came and went. It took some time to build trust but I was never one to just let people pass without saying hello. I found an older man alone and had no one he was a heavy drinker and had probably with his drinking alienated himself from family and that's why he was alone. I looked passed his drinking and got to know him and liked him as a person so I did what I could to help him when he needed it. There was a younger girl just moved out of her parents house into her first apartment I helped her move in and kept an eye out for her as she worked late hours and came home after dark. I would not sleep well until I heard her on the steps and safely into her apartment. I now wonder if I am the only person like this. I am not nosy but I do care about people and especially those that live around me. I would hope if one of my neighbors passed and I did not see them for days that I would check on them to see if they were OK.
When I grew up if someone moved into the neighborhood the neighbors would bring a dish of food or stop to offer a hand moving items. Yes some of that was curiosity or busybody behavior but it was also knowing your surroundings and feeling safe with who lived next door. You can never completely know people or trust them but at least know who lives next door. I have talked to people who do not even know the name of the person living right next to them. When did we become like this hiding in our homes after work ignoring each other pretending no one exists? Rushing back to the safety of our locked doors.
I know we can never return to the days of leaving our doors unlocked and letting our children play unsupervised but I would hope we can at least keep an eye out for each other and help each other in times of need.
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