I recently had a chance to visit with some friends that I had not seen since we graduated from High School. Even though so many years had past it felt as if we just picked up were we left off or as if we had seen each other a few days ago. It was great to talk to people who knew what I was talking about and shared many of my memories of the past. I never really thought about it back then but my friends were and are a part of my family even though we may not share blood we share memories of what at the time felt like the most difficult time in our lives. We grew up together maybe not always as close as we would have liked but they were the faces I saw everyday in the halls and in the classes I attended. Back when I was in school our town was small and everyone seemed to know everyone else in some way or another. We came from different backgrounds and social standings but none of that seemed to matter or at least it did not to me. I was the type person if I liked someone I liked them not for what they wore or what their social standing was and once I made a friend they stayed always in my mind a friend. I may have gotten angry with them at times and we may have fought but I still felt they were a friend. As we moved from grade to grade I would make new friends but I never forgot those friends I had made before.
We started out in Kindergarten and depending on the area you lived decided on what grade school you would attended. We had about 5 grade schools at that time with two Kindergarten classes in each and we would for the most part attend those schools until 4th grade unless someone moved to a different location or moved away the school you went to would be the group of people you spent the next four years with growing and learning. After those four years came to an end we would move on to Middle school which our town had two and once again depending on were you lived would depend on were you would attend school. The one school had been built many years ago and at once housed the High School students and was later turned into a middle school after a new high school had been built. This would be the school I would attended and it was a very old three story brick building that was in for the most part neglected and in need of repair. It had plaster walls and lots of real wood doors and wood molding and the wood floors would creaked when you walked on them lets just say there was dark stained wood everywhere framing the doors the windows etc. We did not have air conditioning a slight breeze was seldom on hot days given by an open window. The other Middle school was newer and more up to date and modern and had air conditioning. After three years in that Middle we all moved to the newer school for one year. In that move we were combined together with the people from that school and we would spend the next five years together. Twelve years of my life spent of people coming and going friendships built and as I said before they were like my extended family. There are points about those days I miss but there are also many that I could have done without.
Later in my life I seem to do most of my communication either in my blog, by phone or through other social media on the computer so I seldom get the chance to talk to people face to face theses days. It was nice to catch up and actually talk but I fear I in not talking for so long monopolized the conversation something I have a habit of doing. I tend to start talking and then can not shut up. I have found and reconnected with many people on Facebook and enjoy being included in their lives. Seeing their children their homes pets etc. I think once I left high school it was like I lost a large part of my family and it is so nice to reconnect with them.
I have heard some say they feel as though some people on Facebook brag about how well they are doing. Hmmm maybe some do but I have to say I am proud of my friends and my family for the things they have accomplished and enjoy hearing about the car they bought or the trip they took or their new Grandchild. I do not see it as bragging I see it as me sharing in their good fortune like I have said many times before I think differently than most I guess. While I was going through my cancer treatments those stories and sharing was my only contact with the outside world. Like many other things in my life I became addicted to Facebook and would wake in the morning and check to see what was going on. I am trying to cut back on my Facebook time and have started slowly doing so but still feel withdrawal now and then.
I like to know how and what makes people tick such as what is their high points and what they would consider their lows. Most people share more about their highs for fear people will think they are winning in some way if they discuss the bad things in life. Hell I know I have days I feel like shit and am grateful to be able to post it and get feed back, love,prayers etc. I am less and less private with my life as I age I think because I become less and less fearful of what people think. I know when I first was dealing with my cancer I was not going to let anyone know about it. I am so glad I wised up and shared this with my extended family because without them and their support I am not sure I would have gotten through those real rough days. And I will or can not forget the input on how to deal with all the things that come up while going through the proses of chemo and radiation. Helpful hints from others who had been through it or were dealing with it at the time. And by sharing I found out about a support group that I would otherwise not have known about.
I went through a few years after I left High School thinking I would just leave that life in my past or that I did not need those people anymore. When I first got online back well more years than I care to admit I started spending a lot of time in chat rooms and those people, people I did not even know became my go to persons to talk to. Those were some of the loneliest years I have ever spent in my life. I had stop drinking and drugging so I had cut ties with friends because they were still doing those things and I could not handle being around it. So I worked came home and sat at my computer talking to people who probably were not what or who they said they were but I for some reason put my trust in them and considered them my friends. That went on for about three years until I moved up north living in the sticks and had no internet. It was hard at first but I soon replaced that time I would spend online with walks with my dogs and talking with neighbors.
I lived there for about two years and loved it but there was no work and I was forced to move back down and moved a few towns over from were I had grown up. I had been away long enough that I had lost contact with just about all my old friends and they had gone on with their lives moved to other states etc. I just figured it was how life is, people come and go, and you deal with it.
Back to my story of seeing friends. I guess I did not realize just how much I had missed those people and how much they had meant to me. Just seeing them again made me smile and feel better than I had in a long time. I felt comfortable with them and free to be myself and say what ever the hell I wanted. It was great that they remembered the same things I did and talking with them sparked memories I had forgotten about. Looking back at those High School days I truthfully can say it was not all sunshine and roses but I did get to know some great people and am glad to have them back in my life.
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